Turn Your Head And Scoff

According to new research just published in The Archives of Internal Medicine, men who are screened regularly for prostate cancer do not have a significantly greater chance of surviving the disease over those who have never been tested at all.

Studying over 72,000 men who underwent rectal exams from the years 1991 to 1995 in various New England hospitals, the scientists discovered just under half the men examined, despite the doctor-recommended screenings, eventually died from the disease.

The surviving rate of the remaining patients may, in fact, have been a result of regular prostate examinations, but no definitive evidence of this highly debated belief could be concluded.

In a related story, latin pop-singer Ricky Martin spoke out feverishly in favor of regular rectal screenings, claiming he even travels on va-gay-tion with his own personal urologist.